It seems a little early on in this blogging caper to be suffering from writer’s block. But here I am. I just thought I’d start typing and let things flow. It’s a tricky thing – trying to find a natural voice when writing on the internet about your life. What makes it interesting to read? What do I love to read on blogs? Who am I writing it for? Why do I always overthink everything?
So maybe I’ll just tell you about my week. It was my first week as an official job-free SAHM after all, an absolute first in my life. I have to say – I loved it. I love this as my job. My sense of achievement when I (oh god I’m going to say it) cross chores of my list is so much more than I felt in a ‘real job’. Managing a household is not rated very highly these days. Cleaning and cooking are hassles that people seek shortcuts for, if not outsource altogether.
I guess I’m just not comfortable outsourcing my ‘life admin’ to someone else when I’m completely capable of doing it myself and, dare I say it, enjoy it. I love meal planning, managing a budget that feeds my family and saves money to pay our mortgage sooner, being a main influence in the life of my children, helping out at school, shopping smart, making things from scratch, sewing, gardening and making our house a home. I feel that it’s not only important for my own sense of well being, but also for the well being of my family – to foster a sense of security, stability and responsibility in my children.
It’s not an easy job, it doesn’t get a lot of respect and it’s certainly not well paid. And that last reason is what makes me feel guilty for doing it. For not making a financial contribution to our household. And it’s only because we are in a good financial position, that I even have the option to not earn. Managing your own household as a full-time job is now a luxury.
We’ve come a long way with women’s equality and I know there’s still a long way to go. But I resent that in this modern world I feel guilty for wanting to have what’s considered a more ‘traditional’ role.
Right now is the happiest and most fulfilled I think I’ve felt. I hope I can hold on to it for a while.
Okay then. Looks like I may have needed to get that off my chest…